Another day in jail; I wait for visits. Last night, I rose even more within the scale of the hierarchies. I have paid for such an elevation by being in jail; thus, by suffering are degrees gained. I have endured with serenity and patience this painful test, thus I have transformed my very prison into a monastery of sanctity. I have not protested against anybody and I bless my executioners. One must love our friends because they understand us, and our enemies because they do not understand us.
The path is filled with thorns, and the hard stones of the path bleed the feet of the walker. I am suffering, but I hope that Julio Medina V., my beloved disciple, will remove me from this prison. Today, I have sent to Julio some letters requesting more activity from him; I am not afraid, but I have the right to defend myself. One can defend oneself, but without ever hurting anyone.
The esoteric matters that I have lived here in this jail are so beautiful and divine that I can never write them. These things cannot be written; they are "incommunicable" issues. Humans would not understand me if I were to write about these things.
Here, in this jail I have been remembering "Apollonius of Tyana." How great was this man! Apollonius spent the last days of his life in a jail. When Apollonius arrived at Rome, he contemplated the sky and said: "Something great will happen and something great will not happen." That day, a storm exploded, and, at the moment Caesar was drinking, a lightning bolt struck the cup he had in his hand and broke it; nevertheless, Caesar was unharmed.
Apollonius healed the ill. He fed himself only with fruits; he drank only pure water. He was accused of sorcery and locked in a jail, where he died.
So today, here in this jail, I have remembered the great Apollonius of Tyana. We, all the prophets of humanity, have been martyrs; this is why chapter 2 verse 10 from the book of Revelation clearly states the following:
Fear none of those things which thou shalt suffer: behold, the devil shall cast some of you into prison, that ye may be tried; and ye shall have tribulation ten days: be thou faithful unto death, and I will give thee a crown of life.
The entire progress of the Initiate is based on numbers: 1 + 2 + 3 + 4 = 10; this is why it is stated unto us, “and ye shall have tribulation ten days.”
The entire path of Initiation is made of horrible tribulations; the one who treads the path of "Initiation" enters the path of the most terrible bitterness. The basis of Initiation is Chastity.
Yet, behold that within every common and ordinary human being is always Satan, the beast of Fornication, the animal “I” that develops in us the intellect and creates the false intellectual science of which the men of the twentieth century boast.
Notwithstanding I have a few things against thee, because thou sufferest that woman Jezebel, which calleth herself a prophetess, to teach and to seduce my servants to commit Fornication, and to eat things sacrificed unto idols.
And I gave her space to repent of her Fornication; and she repented not.
Behold, I will cast her into a bed, and them that commit Adultery with her into great tribulation, except they repent of their deeds.
And I will kill her children with death; and all the churches shall know that I am he which searcheth the reins and hearts: and I will give unto every one of you according to your works. – Revelation 2: 20-23
Thus, this is how the universal “I AM” speaks to Jezebel; thus “HE” will cast Jezebel into the abyss, and all of them, the children of Fornication who commit Adultery with her. No fornicator can be an Initiate.
The Kundalini rises with Chastity, sanctity, and intense suffering. The path of Initiation is a path of tears and bitterness. It is necessary to rise through the seven scales of fire based on suffering and bitterness.
The seven scales of the power of the fire are symbolized by the seven falls and seven risings of Christ in his ascension towards Calvary.
Visitors are approaching at the moments in which I write these lines. The afternoon is hot, and in this jail only horrible things are heard.
I submerge myself within my Internal God, and within Him I feel filled with plentitude. Thus, this is how I have learned to live as "Daniel" in the lion’s den; this is how I have learned to transform my prison into a monastery of love, light, wisdom, and sanctity. How beautiful is the school of life! Let us be cheerful, brothers and sisters, let us be cheerful...
I hear some guards of the jail speak in wrathful manner. The visitors are impatient; some women and children wait with infinite anxiety to see and greet their beloved prisoners... I am in the midst of the pain, and I understand that “this is how the great cosmic Initiations are gained”: the gendarmes are closing the doors, and preparing everything in order to receive the visitors. Wretched gendarmes; how tenebrous is the kingdom of the devil.
The visits were all full of love. The prisoners were very much happy... and the visitors embraced their beloved prisoners. My priestess-wife wept when taking leave of me after the visit. Three other friends visited me; I thanked them very much for their visit.
My priestess-wife and I commented a little about the new degree that I received, that cost "jail for me." My spouse is very well informed about everything because "she is an Initiate" and nothing can be hidden from her.
The visit seems to have perfumed the tenebrous atmosphere of this jail. The perfume of fraternity is sublime. "Love is the incense of the Gods." The Sun is already setting in the West, and I continue meditating.
This chapter is from Secret Notes of a Guru (1952) by Samael Aun Weor. This book has not yet been published; help us publish it: make a donation.